There was a rascal in the town where I came from. The people thought that he was dumb, because he couldn't do a stump. That's why they nicknamed him Huckleberry Finn.
But he believed in fun, laughed at everyone, how I wish I were him. Huckleberry Finn, if I were Huckleberry Finn, I'd do the things he did, I'd be a Finn again. You'd always find me out picking beside a shady booth, which in there never was a sooth.
If I were only Huckleberry Finn, in every mix if I did, and on my peckle face, you'd always find a grin. I wouldn't put my shoes or stockings on for any man, and all I'd ever wear would be a coat of tan, if I were Huckleberry Finn. They tried to teach him how to do arithmetic, but he just wiggled on the stick, because the figures made him sick.
Adding and counting don't mean a thing to me. When I begin to learn, then I'll start to learn how to count, they said he. Huckleberry Finn, if I were Huckleberry Finn, I'd do the things he did, I'd be a Finn again.
You'd always find me out picking beside a shady booth, which in there never was a sooth. If I were only Huckleberry Finn, in every mix if I did, and on my peckle face, you'd always find a grin. I wouldn't put my shoes or stockings on for any man, and all I'd ever wear would be a coat of tan, if I were Huckleberry Finn.
Huckleberry Finn, he wore his knuckles very thin. From playing marbles he was no more miles around. He went to church class when they packed the contribution box.
He'd fall asleep just like a fox. That's why they called him Huckleberry Finn. I can't stop laughing over him.
He'd buy a candle for old Fido's tale and grin. He'd stand out in the middle of the road and holler, hey, just to see the farmer's horses run away. Some kid was Huckleberry Finn.
Transcribed by AI from the recording above. These are noisy hundred-year-old cylinders, so expect misheard words and the occasional invented line — trust your ears over the text.
Audio public domain, courtesy of the UCSB Cylinder Audio Archive. Transcript CC BY 4.0. Free to reuse, including commercially, with credit.
Premier Quartet
A studio ensemble rather than a touring band. Record companies kept groups of session players on call and issued them under a rotating set of house names — the personnel overlapped heavily from one to the next, and the name on the label indicated the kind of music inside more than who was performing it. Individual players were rarely credited, and for most of these ensembles the membership is now unrecoverable.
Written from UCSB Cylinder Audio Archive. Corrections welcome.