Women and Men

Transcript

Women and Men, sung by Ben Elbert, selling records. Women and men, you will hear people say, are unlike each other in every way. But I will prove that nine times out of ten, men are like women and women like men.

Women sometimes like the color their cheeks until they are red as red roses. But while we have women with blue and red cheeks, there are men who've got blue and red noses. Women I'm told are inclined to complain, and say in the background their forms are inane.

Men get the best of it so they are served, and the world sees a lot more of him than of her. But when you go to a theater or ball, you're partly naïve yet unconscious. When you see the ladies in evening dress, well you still see a lot of them, don't you?

Women, they say, with a trivial claim, are often unlikely seemingly brave. For where there's a glass, they look in it with pride. And so will a man if there's whiskey inside.

Men who keep drinking will often get type that's right and he couldn't be righter. But twenty eggs laid round a twenty-nine weight, make a woman a jolly bright rider. Some folks assert that where Edward's concerned, he's man whom the family's position has earned.

Yet many men who have risen to fame, declare that their wives are the credit to claim. Men of great learning are called on the top, and I submit this proposition. Many bald-headed men in this white world today, thank their wives for their hair and condition.

Most of you know there's an idea afloat, that women like men at elections should vote. Some people say the political she, and member of parliament someday will be. Women in parliament, I think, might lead to many a gentleman's job, Eric.

But I really can't see they'd be very much worse than the lot of old women that are there.

Transcribed by AI from the recording above. These are noisy hundred-year-old cylinders, so expect misheard words and the occasional invented line — trust your ears over the text.